1. PROFIT!
2. FREE MEDICAL TREATMENTS?
3. Constructive criticism please ♥
4. Comments are screened
5. Contact: anonymousdeathgod@gmail.com

[audio]

Okay, okay. Let's get this straight. Whoever thinks this event or curse or deity gift certificate to the tunnel of crazy is fun should think about it.

Way to be obvious, Forehead.

It's damp, it's dark, and waking up on your best friend's chest is awesome, obviously.

Ugh, you would be so lucky.

... This cramped boat is adorable, obviously--

It would be more adorable if you were on this thing with a guy and not me.

And the noises around us, such detail, is absolutely commendable. Obviously!

But nooooo, you rejected them all. I mean, I took the time to find you some cute guys to date, and you willingly choose to become a cat lady.

And--PIG, WOULD YOU SHUT UP ALREADY?!

[ooc; Ino and Sakura. They're on a boat.]

For your future information, Ino, and everyone else in the City that was informed and has pitied me, listen:

ONE CAT DOES NOT MAKE ME A CAT LADY.

Furthermore, I don't want a boyfriend. I've other things I need to do. And I don't want to be set up on blind dates. That especially. And Ino, stop blackmailing people into dating me, by the way -- big kick to the ego, if I had any left by now, considering my best friend (former best friend) is setting me up because she thinks I'm hopeless. Also, the other part of the date isn't too happy with it either, and that just stinks.

In conclusion. Not a cat lady. Not hopeless. Get out.

[private; unhackable]

I am strong, I am capable, I am pretty. I'm a strong, capable and pretty girl. I don't need dates. I don't need guys.

...they don't need me, so why even start. Not even a word from...

[/private]

Oh! Almost forgot--I have a phone now. So if you need my phone number for work or...I don't know...let me know. And I'll let you know. Ahah... Lame.

( private )
I don't know why, but I have a bad feeling about something... Weird.

It could've been the dreams. I heard yesterday was a most busy, and traumatic day for some? I guess I lucked out, since I was at work... Good thing, that. I haven't had a nightmare in...a while now. And I doubt anyone would've liked to butt in on them.

Anyway. Since Shikamaru's gone, and I can't exactly talk to him about- So suppose I want to buy one of those mobile phones. Where do I get one, and what are the best offers? And by best, I mean cheap. I don't want to spend all the City coins on text messages--whatever those are.

[ooc; C-come meet the girl beyond Ino's matchmaking schemes? Or stare at her. It'll make her just as uncomfortable, and that's gonna work the same with me. 8Da]

[action/video/whateveryouwantbb]

[Tis the season to be jolly, right? Tis also the season to shop like mad for Christmas presents, and any idiot with a two-inch forehead would know that to start early is key. Unfortunately, Sakura's forehead is way, way larger, and she's also busier than that (complete bullshit), so she is out in town today, scouting for presents.

The mistletoe tailing her everywhere? Apparently the City thinks she's a prude in need of a lay, too.]

Okay, so, purple for Ino...obviously...

[ooc; It's also, actually, her first serious curse ever, so please, please, please break her. Assume action, if you want. There's enough saliva in her mouth to go around. Wait that sounds wrong.]

Dr. Chase, thank you for the vote of confidence the other day. I'm very satisfied with the possition I've been offered on staff, but wanted to ask you--you mentioned you wanted me to meet someone?

[private to Ino]

Alright, tell me. I saw something weird with your 'friend with benefits' yesterday. He didn't seem that much of a jerk before...

I've been here for less time than most of you, and I already know that nothing good'd come out of pushing the button. I mean, yeah, sure, I might be given a prize, or taken home - but do I really want to do that at the price of someone else's safety? Sanity? Life?

The answer is not.

I would not have said no to the money, I guess. The job hunt continues. I suppose it wouldn't hurt to try it again. Does anyone know who I should direct myself to in order to get employment at the hospital, please? I am a hardworker, I have steady hands, I have had an excellent intructor--the best alive--and I learn fast. If you have any other questions, I'll gladly answer them.

So, aside from...all this. I hope that those I spoke to during the statue invasion were left unscathed.

[private to Ino]

Red or green, Pig?

[voice;]

Are blackouts a common thing here? Repairs, maybe? Becau--

[PAUSE; DKJHSDGJK]

Who's there? I will not hesitate to attack! I--

[shuffles around, and a moment later her hands are lit up with chakra--because who brings a katon on the streets guys]

...statue?

[ooc; i might drop dead because lol 3am but replies will recommence tomorrow!]

I don't get it. I've heard people go on and on about curses, about how some are actually fun - for whom?

All I've seen so far are deaths, and cannibalism, and horror, and people getting trapped. Is this really that good? Honestly...

I'd like to ask for a job at the hospital. Who should I ask about that?

[ooc; this is theoretically her 'first' 4th wall day since the restart, and she doesn't know wtf's up, so please be gentle. i ask that no current canon spoiling be done for the love of god, please or my muse'll explode aa. &hearts]

[filter: allied shinobi]

You'll have noticed the sudden influx of cannibalism. I'm going to suppose this is a curse. So if just for today, we need to take other people, who can't defend themselves, to safety.

This apartment seems big enough. I'll set up traps around it, once we get everyone inside. But just in case, it wouldn't hurt to think of a bigger location, with food and preferably weapons, where no-one would be at a disadvantage. Shikamaru, ideas?

[filter: sasuke]

Stay inside today, unless you want to help us. Or are affected. Please don't be

[public]

Repetition is the key of survival in this case. Everyone should stay inside today. If you're not inside yet, run fast.

[ooc; so like. she'll be running around, saving the peoplez with her super team of awesome kunoichi. and shikamaru. probably. the people affected that want to try to get a nibble of her, ask away 8)? she's too good for her own good sometimes anyway same goes for people who want to be saved!]

So, let me see if I get all this straight.

This place is some sort of world-between-worlds, not a genjutsu, controlled by people called Deities. These deities bring us here for no other reason than to have entertainment. Which is why we have curses--not that I've seen what those are like so far. The ticking comes from some sort of mechanism which many have tried investigating but it's somewhere hidden so tough luck. Living alone makes the ticking loud, and makes you go insane. Which is why when I was last here I had a place and called so many people in to live with me.

Funny. I guess I really don't want to go insane. Then again, who does? I've seen senile people, and insane people, and trust me on this, the difference lays in how similar to a snake they look.

Also, since I'm underage, I get money from the City. But frankly, I'd rather earn my own money here, so...is there any way of helping at the hospital?

That's it. Did I get it right?

[ooc; parents have kidnapped me, replies will arrive latar]

[accidental video post]

[The City decides to greet Sakura this time by dumping her into the fountain. Yes this is new.]

--huahghfff--what the hell--

[Feed cuts off, oops accidentally touched that button. There's silence.]

[HALF AN HOUR LATER.]

[voice post; public]

Hello. My name is Sakura.

Okay, I've had someone explain the gist of this place to me, and let me tell you, that someone needs to stop it with the alcohol. Clearly not a genjutsu. So. Whoever dragged me here, let me warn you--these hands can do as much damage as they can fix, and you are going down.

Also, I'd be very grateful for a guide and the way out, thank you!

[very failed (for now) shinobi filter]

One, two...eight signatures

Who is here?

[ooc; Uh. Restart from the chapter where...Konoha got saved...and people they be rebuildin'.]

Huh. I've been here for two years. I wonder if I should celebrate it. Maybe...

Let's see.

( came and left )

Stayed:
Sasuke
Shikamaru
Ino
Rin-chan
Obito-chan
Neji
Hinata-san
Naruto.

I...I don't know if this should be a list for you, Shikamaru, of if this is a list for me, but...two years is a long time to be in this place. I've seen people come, people go. I've seen them return with their memories intact, but some didn't remember a thing. Those are the ones that hurt meeting again. Repeating the same talk...

"You shouldn't be here."

And thinking the same thing.

But I'm so glad you are, because it was getting so lonely.

Does this make me selfish? To sometimes smile when I see my friends arrive here, even though it's not somewhere where we belong? I've been here for two years. This place...must really love me, because...I always come back, and always remember it vividly. After two years, getting out seems harder and harder, but I still agree that we can, sometimes. Just excuse me if I'm more skeptical about it than most. I think I'm allowed to be a little bit selfish. After two years, things here are finally...balanced. What a weird thing to say.

But I think there's balance now. I'll keep the reasons to myself. Two years...

I think I need a break from work. And a drink. This calls for one.

[ooc; The cut is not IC, I'm just sparing your flist as much as I can. Very introspective, good god.]

...Okay, behave. We've been through this enough times, and you know how it goes.

Don't make me restrain you.

[ooc; ANYTHING IS GO GO GO! ETA: if you'll backdate with me, I'll love you forever. But for now, my incessant headache tells me "go to be you horrible bitch"...so.]

( private; unhackable )

[filtered to Konoha-nin]

I've just confirmed it. Naruto's portrait is in the Hall of Missing...

So...yeah...

[public]

I don't really get the point to wishing on stars anymore. It's nice and it makes sense when you're younger.

[ooc; Naruto left. Sakura is very perceptive to chakra, especially his. Do the maths.]

( filtered; Konoha and Suna )
( private; unhackable )
[public]

That's the second time the kitchen suffers burns. Ino, stop betting with Naruto. Have you learned nothing about gambling from the Hokage? Tch.

[ooc; second link is ooc and not there. Just personal reference. edited a bit.]

Alright. Hit me with your best shot, I don't even care anymore. I think this is my fourth time?

[ooc; Aaaanything goes.]

28th of March.

I passed all my exams, thank my lucky stars. This means I can keep the scholarship all throughout college. Now if only Ino could stop dragging me around for social life.

Oh, and... I'm 18 today. I'll be attending the ball alone.

[ooc; student at the Private co-ed school~! On scholarship. But the uniform~~~]

[voice]

Six...

Katsuyu, please tell everyone to leave and take she-





WILL THIS NEVER GROW OLD, GODDAMMIT?! WHOSE ASS DO I HAVE TO KICK TO GET BACK OUT THERE--

I can't- and you expect me to what, just stay calm and wait-

God, I hate this place!

[ooc; Whinewhinewhine, canon update to chapter 438, page 11.]